Houston's local TV commercials have given us some doozies over the years: manic Mattress Mack; suave, medallion-encrusted Michael Pollack and his unctuous touting of your new life in "beautiful Southwest Houston"; yee-haws in your motor and transmission; this adorably terrible Magick Cauldron ad, and Ray Childress bellowing about Lawrence Marshall's Clobberline, the eternal foe of Big City Prices.

For our money, Father Amco beat them all. 

A car insurance salesman with an intensely dramatic bent, Rehmat Peerbhai's peak on local airwaves was some time back in the 1990s, if memory serves. Such as it was... As I recall, his ads rarely aired, and then only late at night. It appears that he spent more of his ad budget producing these gems than airing them. 

Which is a shame, because they are truly among the greatest terrible local TV ads in this city or any other.

But thanks to the miracle that is YouTube, they are now just a click away.

First, we have Father Amco as the Godfather.

Wait, what? Wasn't the real Godfather in the business of taking payments not to break your stuff? Aren't extortion rackets pretty much the opposite of insurance? Anyway, moving on, we have...

...this short sharp anthology of Father Amco's greatest hits en espanol. (He also goes by "Padrino Amco.")

I like it when he blows up all those dudes in the boardroom. We'll close with what might be his finest role...

...As The Terminator. There's a damsel in distress, and Father Amco gets to beat people up and peel out on a fast motorcycle, both skills I look for in my insurance agent.

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