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Giving new meaning to the term "pizza bagel."

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Got lox but feeling lazy? Like, so lazy you can’t even haul your butt to mediocre-but-ubiquitous Einstein Brothers, let alone New York Bagel Shop? Well, my indolent friend, if you have a roll of prepared pizza dough in your fridge, you’re in luck. (And, if you don’t, this article will show you why you should always have at least one on hand.) You can make fresh, boiled ‘n’ baked, semi-homemade bagels in just over an hour.

No, bagel purists, these bagels will not taste exactly like real/authentic/(insert adjective here to describe connection to that nebulous state known as "truth").  But they will be very close. So, close in fact, that you may even be able to fool your neighbor who makes it a point to tell you every time you see him that he’s “from New York City.” No way, honey, that accent screams Long Island.

Here’s your seven-step pizza dough bagel hack. You will need:

  • 1 roll (about 13 oz) of pizza dough (duh)
  • Water
  • Salt
  • 1 beaten egg

Optional: bowls full of toppings such as sesame seeds, poppy seeds, etc. 

Instructions

  1. Pop open tube of dough and mold into a large disc. Let rest for 20 minutes on a floured surface.
  2. Use a dough cutter to cut the dough into four pieces. However, since you’re the type of person who makes bagels out of pre-bought pizza dough, you probably don’t have this implement, so use a sharp knife instead.
  3. Mold each piece of dough into four bagels; this video will help.
  4. Place bagels on floured surface and let rise another 20 minutes. In the meantime, bring a stockpot of salted water to boil and preheat oven to 450 degrees.
  5. Boil each bagel approximately 2 minutes on each side and place on baking sheet lined with wax paper.
  6. Brush each bagel with the beaten egg and douse in the topping(s) of your choice. Take the opportunity to adorn with unusual, hard-to-find garnishes. I suggest dried dill.
  7. Bake for 15 minutes to produce very soft, chewy bagels; 20 minutes for browner bagels with a crunch.
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