Sometimes a place makes the news for all the wrong reasons, and lately the great region of Houstonia has seen it all: arachnids on a plane, unfortunate brawls, unwanted genital sightings, inopportune pop-up porn, illegal seafood... We know. It’s crazy out there. Let’s start at the beginning.
United Airlines followed its passenger-dragging incident with a scorpion falling from an overhead bin onto Houston-to-Calgary passenger Richard Bell’s head and stinging him, which wasn’t the best PR. Bayou City Wings saw a video of a fight in its bar go viral, which Director of Operations Max Thweatt called “an unfortunate incident,” and we agree. Texas A&M didn’t look great after some said the university didn’t adequately respond to claims football player Kirk Merritt had exposed himself to two female tutors; his excuse, by the way, was “jock itch.” Hmm. HISD was no doubt thrilled by a report that a group of Longfellow Elementary students had accidentally viewed what a parent called “lesbian porn” in their classroom; spokeswoman Ashley Anthony must have been loving life when she had to put out a statement on that one. Ruggles Black, meanwhile, took a plunge in the public eye following the news that owner Bruce Molzan allegedly had been buying and selling illegally caught seafood, making $400,000 off the years-long scam; reps for Ruggles Green, which Molzan sold in the fall, were quick to release a statement explaining that they no way, no how have anything whatsoever to do with that Molzan character. Now, you know what? Let’s end on something happy. The Houston Zoo enjoyed a nice moment in the spotlight with the birth of Masai giraffe Zindzhi, who was featured by People magazine in a story called “Meet the 5 Zoo Giraffes Born While We’ve Been Waiting for April to Give Birth.” As we’re sure you’ll agree, she’s a looker.