I will take credit for the Astros World Series victory. Yes, I don't care about that insanely prescient Sports Illustrated cover from 2014. And no, please don't go on about that George Springer. It was me.
You see, I am the good luck charm. In 2015, I was there when the Chicago Blackhawks took home their sixth Stanley Cup, when Chicagoans flooded the streets of Boystown whooping and hollering and getting so hyped up that they flipped cars. In 2016, I was there when the Chicago Cubs broke the Curse of the Billy Goat, with the ensuing parade down Michigan Avenue leaving 108 years of trash strewn about. In 2017—thankfully for Houston—I moved back home, and here we are.
However, I do not will these victories into being out of an immense love for sport. Quite the contrary. I am the bandwagoner to end all bandwagoners, latching onto whatever team will give me that sweet, sweet parade. The esprit de corps that comes with fandom is universal and obvious, but winning it all is different, and, considering the Astros just locked down their first title in franchise history, this is new.
So tomorrow, Friday, Nov. 3, starting at 2 p.m. at the intersection of Lamar and Smith, Houston will have its own parade. You must go.
How you get there is the first challenge. Find a train, ride a bike, park on the Pierce Elevated—just find some way to hoof it Downtown, where parking will be limited. Once there, converge upon the orange mass of humanity to join the only modern-day equivalent to those old film reels with New Yorkers waving their hankies on VE Day.
You will cheer in unison—likely in multiple languages—for the scrappy team that had three 100- loss seasons in a row as recently as 2013, the team that proved definitively that a hurricane won't keep Houston down.
You will march the route all the way to City Hall, where you will realize no event besides this World Series victory could bring this many Houstonians from parts near and far into the same space to celebrate the same cause—in 2017, no less. And all will be well.
Houston Astros World Series Championship Parade. Free. Nov. 3 at 2 p.m. Intersection of Lamar and Smith, downtown. More info at hosutontx.gov.