The Snarkivist

10 Questions about the Romphim, 2017's Most Divisive Fashion Statement

Can I request one in olive green by Halloween for my super-gay Top Gun costume?

By Javier Garza May 18, 2017

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Next to man buns and '70s pornstaches, the hottest trend to hit men’s fashion is the RompHim—yes, a romper for men, unleashed unto the world by some Northwestern bros via Kickstarter this week.

Opinions on the the interwebs have ranged from "OMG! Welcome to Trump’s America," to "OMG! I want one in every color." Considering that the Kickstarter has already been backed a dozen times over (and counting), be prepared to see a few off these popping up in your coastal friends’ Insta feeds this summer. So of course we have a few questions.

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1. Does every purchase come with a download code for a Chainsmokers album?

2. There’s a zipper fly for peeing, but what about No. 2? I'm definitely not comfortable with my outfit touching the floor of any gay bar's bathroom.  

3. Why are there no belt loops in case I need to cinch my waist or accessorize?

4. In addition to Jackson Pollock, will other artists that hipsters claim to love be treated to Romphim homages? A colorblocked Rothko version would look great with the right filter.

5. Will this be in mass production by Bonnaroo at the earliest, or ACL at the latest? I mean, we've already missed Coachella.

6. Which is the proper accessory for a Romphim, a backwards cap or a fedora?

7. Will this lead to congestion around the inner thigh machine at the gym as men begin to worry about their thigh gaps?

8. Can I request one in olive green by Halloween for my super-gay Top Gun costume?

9. Is that front chest pocket large enough to hold either a Red Bull or a Bombshell Blonde?

10. Will I look ridiculous in this? Obvi.  Will I still buy one? You know it.

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